----The time is now.
----"Sometimes someone says something really small and it just fits into this empty place in your heart."
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If you could look like anything...anything at all....what would you look like? I'd be the wind.
...........It's easy to be someone's friend when all you need is someone to console you. It's much harder to be there for them when they're happy all the time.
.............Even when I say nothing, it's a beautiful use of negative space.
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Tuesday, February 11, 2003
There's so much that I want to say to him but I don't know how. I want to tell him that it's my only aspiration right now to see him smile. That when he's not happy all I want to do is hold him and make the pain go away. That I want to curl up with him and fall asleep listening to his heart beat. That no one else makes me upset because they're not happy. He just told me that he's not happy and hasn't been for a long time and I almost cried. I'd do anything to make that sadness melt away and for him to know that I think he's wonderful and has no reason to not think so too. He'd try to dissuede me, but I don't think there's anything he could tell me that would make me think any less of him. I don't think that's possible.
I spend so much of my life trying to feel less for people until I have some certainty. I don't like this not knowing, but with him I really can't help it. I'm hopeless.
11:53 AM
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